Lessons Learned From My Dog
In mid February, 2004, a wiggling bundle of joy came into my family’s life in the form of a Black Labrador Retriever named Boomer. He quickly became my steadfast buddy as I was already working from home, so he was with me all day, every day.
He taught me many lessons, and most didn’t really sink in until he was gone, and I had the chance to reflect on all of the time we shared together.
It seems like he was never far from me – under my feet as I drank my morning tea; under my feet as I worked on my computer, either at the bar, outside on the deck, or on the couch.
If I got up to change out the laundry, he followed me. If I got up to do something in the kitchen, he was right there (always hopeful a treat was headed his way!)
(This picture is of him, patiently waiting to walk the beach in Ventura, California!)
It was devastating when we buried him on September 6, 2013, after only 9 1/2 years, due to a quick, unexpected spinal injury that we just couldn’t overcome.
In trying to deal with this horrible loss, I started journaling about all of the funny times we had shared with him, as a family and by myself, and the many lessons he taught me.
It’s funny how we don’t always realize how much we truly interact with our pets, until they leave us. In the days that followed, I caught myself repeatedly about to say something to him; reached down to pet him at my feet; listening for the sound of his tags rattling on his collar; or his feet coming up the stairs; him in his water bowl; and any number of other comfortable, constant sounds and actions that made his presence known.
Lessons about life and business come in all different ways, and I wanted to share a little of what I learned from my dog, Boomer, over the last 9 years, with him as my kind, loving, loyal and sweet companion.
- Be joyful and positive. Wake up everyday with an intention to be happy and spread positive energy. Don’t be a downer; or complain. If you have a business, understand the highs and lows and find the silver lining in everything.
- Appreciate and love others. Boomer always let me know I was appreciated; a wagging tail at the door when I came home; a lick on the face, toes or hands when I fed him; always being there with a smiling face and a consoling spirit when I was sad. In your business, don’t get upset when people say no, quit or aren’t interested. Love and appreciate them where they are in their journey.
- Be unforgettable. Once he was gone, the silence was deafening and the little things I took for granted were so clearly missing. His sounds, habits and joyfulness make him truly unforgettable. In your business, under promise and over deliver.
- Be on time. God knows, he never missed a meal and was on time for them all. He was also ready at a moment’s notice to go to the lake; walk on the beach or take a ride on the car. In fact, anything we wanted him to do, he was ready and on time. In your business, show up when you say you will, prepared!
- Communicate your needs and wants. Whether he was hungry, had to go to the bathroom, or just wanted some attention, he communicated it clearly and directly. There was no beating around the bush. In your business, say what needs to be said. Ask people for a decision and let them know you would love to have them on your team and why.
- Expect the best. Boomer expected everything to be fun and exciting. There was no “Eeyore Syndrome” in him. He never hesitated because it was snowing; raining; the stars weren’t aligned or he was having a “bad hair day.” He expected the best, always. In your business, you must EXPECT success. The past does not equal the future.
- Be spontaneous and adventuresome. Like being on time, Boomer never said “no!” He never had something better to do than go with the family out boating on the lake, or walking on the beach. He didn’t have a TV show he needed to finish first, or a Blog post to be written before doing those things that are important. (Note to self – remember this!) In your business, some things may show up that you aren’t expecting. Listen to your gut and don’t be afraid to think outside of the box.
- Don’t save the “good stuff” for later. I have been taught this lesson more than once, and it obviously didn’t sink in. I needed something to bribe him to walk up a ramp and into the car, as my body was becoming worn out from trying to lift and manipulate a 90 pound dog into my car for treatments. I couldn’t always get help. I found a bag of assorted yummy doggie treats that had been under the cabinet for a while. What was I saving them for? Why did he not get to enjoy them all. Sadly, he didn’t make it to finish them off. In your business, reward your self each step of the way. Don’t set goals so high that it seems like a chore. Celebrate everything!
- Don’t worry about little things. Like with children, a spotless house usually means an empty house; and so what is the point? Who cares? It’s much more meaningful to focus on what really matters. (Note to self – don’t lose sight of this.) In your business, there will be peaks and valleys. Most of it won’t matter in a few days, weeks or months.
- Live in the moment. Dogs seem to have no past and no future. They are there, on the ready, for whatever. As humans, we tend to spend too much time dwelling on a past that can’t be changed and no longer matters; and a future that is not promised to us; only hoped for. Had I known what was coming, I would have taken him to the lake a LOT more this past summer. In your business, enjoy the journey. Don’t always be thinking toward the next promotion.
- Pay attention to those meaningless things that irritate you. Over the past few days, I noticed the sweet little nose smudges on the glass door; the tufts of dog hair floating out from under furniture and other pieces of evidence that he had been there. Today, these things bring tears to my eyes and I can’t bring myself to wipe off the window, or sweep the floor. Why did this irritate me so much before? In your business, it’s easy to let little things derail you. Go back to – Don’t sweat the small stuff!
- Be a good listener. Boomer was a great listener and he heard many of my deep, dark secrets; rants; excited tales and more. He listened patiently, and never tried to “fix” anything, or offer his opinion, unless I asked. And, he always agreed with me (wink) by laying his ears back and smiling like only dogs can. In your business, listening is the most important gift you can give another.
Most dogs and other pets will teach us these lessons, if we will just clear a space and be open to receiving them. My hope is to hold these lessons in my heart and honor his life and memory by living by them better than I have in the past.
Only another dog lover can truly understand the pain and heartbreak of losing their beloved, and even harder when we have to make the choice to cut short a life we value so much, in order to spare them more pain and agony. They count on us for everything, including doing right by them at all times.
And while we had to make that heart wrenching decision on his behalf, I asked him to give me a sign when it was time. He gave me two, and loved me to the end.
My only solace has been thinking about the movie, “Million Dollar Baby”, about the female boxer who became completely paralyzed after a fight. She begged her trainer to not leave her that way; that is was not a life, and not something she wanted to continue.
I have to believe that the two signs Boomer gave me were his way of asking us to relieve him of his duty; his pain, and a life that would never satisfy a dog as active and full of life as Boomer was.
If you’ve read this far, I thank you for sharing this journey with me, and allowing me to provide my own relief and therapy by writing about it. And, I hope that some piece of this will strike a chord with you, if you find any of these lessons something you need, as well.
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Jeniffer Huie says
So sorry to hear about Boomer. I had to put my furry companion down 12/26/2012. It's not easy. This is a lovely, tear jerker of an article with important lessons to be reminded of. Thanks for sharing and being such a great role model.
Lorian Rivers says
Wow, had to finish that thru some seriously misty eyes! Been there, done that and it still breaks my heart every time I think about it!
This piece was fantastic! I read all the way thru each number, and will try my hardest to remember them all!
Thanks so much for sharing!
Art Burleigh says
Oh Jackie, Marlyn and I empathize SO much with your loss of Boomer. We lost our 14 year old dog a while back too – and it was heartbreaking. Your essay here on “Lessons Learned from My Dog” is beautifully written and so heartfelt . . . AND profound & helpful. Thanks so much for investing your time and love for Boomer to compose it — AND for sharing your remarkable insights on how Boomer helped you appreciate life more and how to be a better person and business colleague.
Lisa Kneller says
So sorry about your loss Jackie. Your tribute reminds me of how much my dog loves and follows me. I do take her for granted some days. Thanks for sharing this touching story. It does relate well to business and our attitudes!
Hugs,
Lisa
Anna Barnett says
Jackie, I sat here reading this with 2 of my 4 dogs resting their heads in my lap. They keep me company as I work from home and they are the constant reminder to me that I should be the person that they think I am. I know how hard it is to lose a dog and I am so sorry that you had to let go of Boomer so soon. I am glad he was able to share to some wonderful wisdom with you.
Frank Marshman says
Hi Jackie,
I was going to gloss over this as I’ve read many smultzie diatribes to pets before. But I started reading it and was mesmerized by your tribute to Boomer. Having had many dogs since I was a child I understand the love, joy, pleasure and pain when either the dog dies or we have to make the decision you did to end it’s misery.
You are a wonderful wordsmith and I loved how you related all that Boomer did to building a business and all that goes into that.
Thank you Jackie, I appreciate you.
Jackie Ulmer says
Thanks Frank! I really wanted to do more than just “droll on and on about my dog.” I really didn’t get how close I was to him or what a big role he played in my life. It was just shocking that he went so fast and so young, relatively speaking. Thanks for the positive feedback. It is still painful, and day to day…but, like we all do, we get through it!
EXPECT Success!
Jackie Ulmer
Frank Marshman says
This is one of the best tributes to a dog I've read in a long time. Jackie Ulmer is a wonderful wordsmith and a truly delightful lady. Thanks Jackie
Terry Snyder says
Thanks for sharing your feelings, Jackie. I know how hard it is to carry on after a cherished member of the family who happens to be a dog finishes this leg of his journey with us. Scooter was with our family for 18 years. The last 8 she was stone blind but never offered anything but her best. Always a wag… always a wiggle… always the best attitude imaginable. She’s been gone now for 6 yars but I still see and hear things that cause me to feel her presence. They now bring an instant smile to my face as I remember the activities associated with them. It gets better… I promise.
Jackie Ulmer says
It’s amazing, isn’t it Terry? Sad, but true….painful but powerful!
EXPECT Success!
Jackie Ulmer
Tracy Monteforte says
What a wonderful tribute to your beloved friend and faithful companion. Our animals really do have so much to teach us, if only we listen! My heart goes out to you Jackie! We lost our baby girl, Cuddles, at 14 1/2 years old July 10 this year. Not a day goes by I don’t miss her. I still expect to see her on my home office floor, faithful friend that she was. Like your boomer, she followed me everywhere! Sometimes I swear I still hear her claws clicking on the wood floor. All the wonderful photos and happy memories do help ease the sadness of loss. May Boomers paw prints always remain in your heart! Much love to you!
Jackie Ulmer says
Thanks Tracy. Oh, I am so sorry you went through this. It is just painful. We are still working through it and I am so grateful for the time we did have. I keep being reminded – live in the moment! It is ALL we have!
EXPECT Success!
Jackie Ulmer
Laurie Kristensen says
I’m so sorry for your loss, Jackie! This is an amazing and truly beautiful tribute.
I still cry over losing my “heart cat” Jaguar over 2 years ago. I still have 3 other cats and I so dread the days when a similar decision may have to be made. I hope that I also will be able to pick up on any signs they give me if it comes to that.
I hope you don’t mind my asking, what where the two signs that he gave you? I firmly believe animals are spiritual beings, too, and I think that’s so wonderful that you were able to clearly understand him.
Thanks for sharing this!
~ Laurie